I felt so lonely today.

And still.

I just feel like I'm floating around stopping in every now and then to say hello or check up on things in other peoples lives.

I don't feel like I have one of my own.

Sometimes I wonder if I am slowly losing touch with everything, or I'm finally realizing what I need to start doing with my life and what I need to do.

I feel reckless. My emotions are never subtle.

I'm always second guessing myself. This disease has left me with nothing but questions.

I just get this clarity in this terribly dark moment and it just feels unreal. It gets me high, I get crazy and impulsive.

Is this that moment? Or is it real?

Should I give into my heart and self and risk failure or settle with what I have and hope it'll change?

Thinking is making me insane right now.